Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
