playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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