You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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