party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize