you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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