I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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