Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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