I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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