We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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