arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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