Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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