He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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