sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
whose parrot is this?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
