my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
You pole danced in your parka.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
