i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
