I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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