I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
