i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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