you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
