yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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