We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
