my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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