So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
