I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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