Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
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