Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
