One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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