Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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