Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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