I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
