Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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