im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
