Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Randomize