he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
