I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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