If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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