Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
