tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Randomize
