Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
