so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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