I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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