he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Sober January is a disaster.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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