She announced her abortion via fbk
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
