shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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