we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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