I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
