But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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