Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
