my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
