She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Im part way to drunk.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize